The Key Elements of Bondage

There are four key elements to bondage.

They do not always come together in every bondage and they do not have to.

That is up to the dominants' plan and intentions.

But it is important to understand them.

Time

Time is an important factor in most BDSM-play. In bondage, it is crucial. The longer a bondage is being maintained, the more intens its effects will become. And that is not only true for physically demanding bondages, such as a hog tie. Even a very simple bondage will sort a lot more effect, if the effects of it are given a chance to realy kick in mentally. Being restrained is one thing - truly experiencing the fact that freedom is being restricted is something else. Even if that is only a little freedom.

Besides, ropes and knots will quite often work on erotic pressure points and these pressure points again require time, even if you accidentally target them. For western bondage for example, the wrists and ankles and the areas just below the breasts, around the tailbone and just below the buttocks especially have a lot of such points and that, no matter what you do, these will almost always be used, so you might as well take advantage of this.

Helplesness

Helplesness is an important factor to the slave. The fact that she is at the mercy of the dominant is what makes the whole thing tick. That - mentally - is where the power exchange is, regardless if you are just having a fun Friday night or if you have a full scale D/s relationship. Bondage greatly helps to both physically and mentally create this feeling of helplesness, hence you should take as much advantage of it as you can.

Novice doms especially tend to overlook this aspect. While they usually spend a lot of time looking at pictures, once "the real thing" is roped, they will very rapidly proceed to the next steps of their plans and disreagrd the joy, you can find in just taking some time to look at your now helpless slave. That is where she gets turned on, so do take time to let her know she is helpless and at your mercy, without actually doing anything. The anticipation, mild fear and excitement is more than enough, especially in the early stages of your session.Tied slave

Exposure and helplesness go hand in hand. And that is not just sexual exposure. Just the fact that her now restrained body is being exposed (and ready for whatever use) is an important factor that should not be overlooked. Hence, just looking at your helpless slave works miracles.

Be a cat. She or he is now your "prey" - make him or her feel this by walking around, observing or just sitting and looking at your now helpless object of desire.

Being secually exposed is a major fantasy for many, many women, so that is another factor to take into account. Be aware that most women have a love/hate relationship with their genitals - make good use of that by exposing them and leaving her with no option but to be exposed.

Frustration

No, it won't always be easy. It won't always be what he or she expected it to be. They are likely to become frustrated. And ..... that's the whole point.

Frustration is something to be careful with, but something that you should use. Because that is where domination kicks in.

Even if it is only a split second where the dominant will NOT respond to the pleas, cries or whatever, THAT is where he or she is realy and truly dominated and that will leave a major impression.

Hence you may want to take things just a tad further than expected or thought he or she could handle.

And there is nothing wrong with teasing.

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